Putrajaya Floria 2011

I am back! Aiyoo, it's not like you all miss me right? But I miss to rant like a mad-woman,hahahaha!!! Just kidding okay.. 

Yep, I went to Putrajaya Floria 2011. Seriously, this is the very 1st time I have the opportunity to attend this event and I am expecting to see lots of "flower/flora" display and like kid on her 1st day to school, I was extremely excited..

We departed from home at 3.45pm and reached there around 4.15pm. Actually, we are supposed to meet up with my mom-in-law and sis-in-law at PICC (Putrajaya International Convention Center) to attend the "Pameran pengantin" but then we proceed to the "Pesta Floria" 1st since they were delayed by the heavy traffic. My hubby and I intended to explore the whole site but due to the hot whether, plus my  youngest son who is showing his tantrum (he cry and shout all the time we there) we cut out our visit and headed to Kajang because my hubby have something to do there before we meet up with my in law at PICC at 6.30pm. After Maghrib, we watch the decorative boat/junk for a while then we went off to my in law house at Semenyih. 

Overall, I did enjoyed my short visit to this despite of my youngest son tantrum. Lots of people attended the events and I could see lots of photographer taking the opportunity to snap pics of the beautiful flowers especially roses that designed in such unique way. I feel jealous  of their high tech camera compared to my borrowed Samsung digital camera..(*sobbing) I need to buy one like them... Moreover, hubby didn't manage to capture lots of pics since wwe are busy persuading our youngest son..

To me this kind of event should held more often since events like this give people the opportunity to appreciate the beauty of floras/flower beside being a good activities to gather and spend with family. For those who have not yet attend/visit the fiesta, it's not to late to do so because the fiesta will continue until 17th July 2011. If you gonna attend it, don't forget to bring along your best camera because there are lots of beautiful scenery and flower design that you can capture at the site. I feel down to earth actually to show pic that hubby snap during the visit but being the being the 'muka tembok', I proudly present you the few pic taken on that day..Hihihihi, kalau mo kutuk, silakan jangan segan2 kio..(^_^)V

the whether is hot so the senyum pun  "panas"..hihi

Eyas struggling and crying..Me trying to act cool but silently I feel like want to shout.. =(

Sawadikap!! betul ka itu spelling..hahahaha

nah, i like thi sone flower design !

I love this pic though I don't know why! =D

Pic at the front yard of PICC..Nice view kan..

Adehh..kasihan betul ni pic..gelap!

I guess that all i can say about my visit to Putrajaya Floria 2011. Yeah, it might sound kind of boring but hopefully you won's fell asleep reading it..WOITT!! wake up! Hahahaha.. 

Good day and happy reading everybody!

P/S: If i have the time will try to re-visit the event again..

Flu + Friday + Workaholic = Work With Flu On Friday! =P

This morning I wake up with a terrible flu! I hate flu especially when it come with running nose and watery eyes! Rasa macam mo bergulung macm tenggiling ja.. Hubby said no need to go to office if I am sick but being the stubborn + workaholic me, I just ignore it..Haiya, I will feel bore at home and end up cleaning up rather than resting. So I think better I go to office and settle my pending task.. At least I can do video conference with our supplier and chatting with them..tidak la keburingan..(*wink)

My hubby did scolded me saying, "Awak ni, sakit-sakit pun nak pi kerja juga! Kalau jadi teruk, saya juga yang susah!" 

I understand his worries because he is concern about my blood pressure so I replied,trying to soothe him, "alah, kerja kat ofis tu tak susah pun. I can always take a break/nap if I feel sick or something. I don't like staying at home alone la Ling."

Yep, I am one of those woman who don't like being a 24/7 housewife! I like working though my family is still my priority. Lots of people go to work because they feel like they have to in order to support their family but in my case, I go to work because I like working at being paid for working. I enjoy doing anything (excluding illegal/bad thing) as long as I have something to do. That is why I have no problem when I change my career from being a chemist to administration/accounting executive. 

My hubby complained to me one day, "I never heard you complaining about your work. Awak tak pernah rasa tension ke kerja kat sana?"

"I only feel tension with those demanding customer but I never feel like hating my job," I told him honestly since I do feel tension during work hour especially when I have to face with customer with "royal" demand but I enjoyed myself doing my job.

Lots of people especially those who work in lowest of career hierarchy tend to hate their job. But to me, we should love or at least enjoy doing our job and think positively though our job might be not as glamor or high-pay as other job. When we enjoying our job than only we can work happily, betul tak? 

However, I never bring back my job at home no matter how urgent it is! That's my rule in my career. I rather stay back and finish up the task at office (limit = 8.00pm) than bringing it back at home..Home sweet home bah! I will never ever want to become like the cartoon below (touch wood):- 

Image from knowabouthealth.com

Image by Mr. Google

No matter how much I like working, like others me too can't hardly wait for Friday! On Friday my lunch hour is longer than other days, on Friday I can go back earlier than other days and on Friday less customer calling for inquiries or quotation or even purchasing stuff from my company!

Alamak! I think I rants out of topic already..hihihihi..Well, my main point here is I like working but still I appreciate my weekend and off day very much because I can spend it with my family especially my kiddos.

Okay, got to stop now because hubby already signalling me that he want to use the PC. Have a wonderful weekend you all! ciao...(^_^)

P/S: Actually hubby want to try creating his own business card with Businesss Card Star as suggested by Just in her entry about The Importance Of Business Card. Thanks for sharing kio moi!

What Will You Do?

I am sleepy but I haven't write anything in this online book of mine for quite sometime and it's make me feel like I am missing of something..Actually, sia lagadon mo mimbobok saja bah..hihihihi =P

Okay,let the ranting begin in 1..2...3..Here we  go! Case 1: What will you do when you bump to someone accidentally?  Some people might shout "hey!watch out" or maybe "takde mata ke?!" or maybe "sorry" and maybe some might just go without saying anything at all. What will I do? Well, being me I probably smile first like "kerang busuk" then I will say sorry and probably do the same although it not even my fault except..mestilah ada kecuali..except if  those people I bumped with being rude with me even after I say sorry..Nah, itu time keluar la tanduk dari kepala.. I won't tolerate with rude people..

Image By Mr. Google

Case 2: What will you do when you are stranded in the middle of nowhere with a group of stranger? At situation like this, some people might started to panic and say ask " what should I do?" or maybe "what should we do" or maybe "Who are you people?" and maybe didn't say anything at all and just follow the group decision. What will I do? Hahahaha, sia ketawa dulu kio because I probably smile and start making friend with those stranger instead of fill my mind with those headache question..

Why all of sudden asking/talking about above story? Well, actually it's something crossed by my mind just now and I am just typing it down here..Geezzzz, I am such a weirdo! But above situation is occupied my mind right now and I can't get rid of it until I get some answer from your guys and gals.. 

Beside that, I am in process of choosing and buying a running shoe because I am going to participate in my sons school marathon this coming Saturday. To tell the truth, last time I bought a running shoes was six year ago. I hope by tomorrow I can decide which one I wanna buy but I am gonna save this story until tomorrow okay.. 

Sorry because this entry is a bit "cincai".. Hahaha, entry pun ikut otak owner yang siodop and mingy.. So till tomorrow..Good night and sleep tight!

P/S: My condition look exactly like the image when I am thinking/deciding of something..

Kiddo Tantrum & Mommy worries

Woahh.. It's almost 3 days since my last update huh? The truth is I have so many thing I want to type down but I have no free time to do so since I am  busy with my overload task at office and  tagging along my hubby delivering order around Puchong and KL for the past 3 day.

Firstly regarding the Oreo Daddy Dunk Event that I said gonna attend. Guess what? We didn't manage to reach OU on time and missed the event! I was so damn sad and upset with my hubby because it was his fault that I missed the event! It was Father's Day on that day, so it's really mean of me if I explode right? So I just calm myself down and think positively. Moreover, it's not like my hubby did it on purpose. Well, some thing cannot always happened according to our plan. But, yes there is BUT because the story continuous and you have to wait my entry tonight..(*wink2)

My main content for today is about my youngest son who is showing his new side of tantrum that make me so damn worried and irritated at the same time. Since he turned to 2 year old, he always shouting and throwing things to his sibling and even to my hubby and me. Last Monday, he threw my other hand-phone and caused a bump on my daughter head. Before that he threw my hubby hand-phone ( luckily it survived) and before that he threw his food that make my hubby smacked his hand. He even tried to threw his bicycle toward his sister once! 

I asked his nanny how was he doing in her care and she told me that he was a good kid and have no problem taking care of him. So I am totally clueless on why he acted like that at home! My hubby said it's normal changes for a toddler of 2 years. Maybe it's true because I have read an article that said at 2 years a toddler became aware of what other people/bigger people can do and they became upset and throwing tantrum when they unable to accomplish those tasks.

I have asked my mother  and in law advice and both of them told me to stay calm and don't start panic because they said my youngest son is in a stage of learning a lot of new things that sometime made him upset when he couldn't do it right. They said all I need to do is to observe him so that he will not do something harmful to himself. I even bring him to see a pediatrician and they too said the same things.Well, both advice sound as same as the article I have read. 

My daughter also have bad temper but it only show when she was almost 4 years old but my youngest son already show them though he is only 2 years old. Right now I am trying the best to calm down and using a soothing words whenever he is angry and upset (as my mom and in law advised) to avoid any other consequence. However, I miss my smiling prince..(*sigh)

Happy moment with my prince of smiling

 So, mummies out there, have you ever face the same situation as mine? How do you cope with it? Please comment and share with me ok.. Ya, sa memang muka tembok kalau bab2 minta nasihat, hihihi.. You know, as Malay proverb proclaimed, ' MALU BERTANYA SESAT JALAN' so I have to ask if i don't know and right now I am truly lost.

That's all for now. Wait for my entry about what exactly happened on last Sunday. Adios! 

P/S: -  I took my 45min morning break to update my entry and stuffing FOOD in my hungry tummy (^_^)V

      

It's Middle Of Month Yet I Am Already Broke!

I am an account/administration executive in my company and I did very well in my job but when comes to my own (personal not family) financial management, I think I am the worst!Why? Because I couldn't resist spending my money at KFC, McDonald, Food Stall, Restaurant etc concerned with food! Hahahaha, Gotcha! The title is just for fun but still a bit related to my entry content, so keep reading.. Muka tembok betul kan suruh2 orang terus membaca..

Normally I am a bit fussy in buying stuff especial if those stuffs are expensive. I compared prices before I purchase something and I am glad because I am not one of those who fanatic/like/love branded items. You know, branded items normally cost equal to my half month salary which I use to buy more item and to me that's really a wasteful! But that's just my opinion and it's differ from one person to another on how they spend their money.. People said, "Duit Aku, Suka Hati Aku la"

However, I never been fussy in spending my money over foods because I love to eat! Now I am broke, almost broke because since earlier month of June my hubby, my kids and I always dine out at this local restaurant called , which is located nearby our flat area (15min driving) that served a very delicious and affordable meal sets for family. Well, it's supposed to be affordable but imagined what happen if you dine out everyday with costs around RM25-RM40 per day? It's only for dinner not yet included my expenses over lunch and junk food! 

Last night I told my hubby,"Ling, our meal monthly budget over limit suda. Malam besok we cook la."

"Abis duit pasal makan takpe.. Weekend we cook okay," he replied nonchalantly. Haiya, like me, he too love foods.. That's why he got that bloated stomach! How I wish my purse is as bloated as his stomach, HAHAHAHA! If you read this hubby, please don't get mad with your darling wife kio.. (^_^)V

But to tell the truth, I face this problem every months and still survive! I don't mind spending money on foods because foods bring my family together. We all (my hubby, my kids and me) love foods and eating out together is one of our favorite time. Just see our happy faces in pics below (taken on 16/06/2011) while and after dinner:-

Even my youngest son enjoying his food!

Hubby and our princess - inseparable! Psst..Did you notice his stomach?

Peace Y'all!

My daughter whine,"Asyik2 ambil gambar! Nak makan pun tak boleh!"

Licin..!

As hubby said,"duit boleh dicari, perut yang lapar isi duluan.." So, I never regret spending money over foods because I know that we can always find honest way to earn money! At the same time I always told my kids to be grateful because they can eat nice food and never forget all of those unlucky people who live in poverty and never have the privilege they have. I hate people who waste food intentionally! Nah, mo start babbling suda ni so better I stop when I still coherent..Muahahaha..

Okay, I haven't wash my kiddo uniform yet and my hubby wanna use our PC,so I will leave you all with this pantun melayu that you might already know:-

GENDANG GENDUT TALI KECAPI,

KENYANG PERUT SENANG HATI!

P/S:-Sorry for the not so good quality of pics since it taken with my HP camera (2.0mp).

Whore In Bed?

Image by Mr. Google

Good day readers! Just now I browsed through the net and after reading few article about this VERY HOT TOPIC about a group of Malaysian women launching this "obedient wife club" who urges its member to be "whore in bed" and obey their husband to prevent social ills such as divorce and domestic violence, I can feel this fingers of mine itching to tap on the keyboard and type down my own opinion about this topic. I don't have to provide you the link of this hot topic since you can just copy paste it to your browser & puff, you will see lots of search result over this topic. It's caused an uproar and havoc amongst women! ( I am one of those who feel angry over this deprived suggestion)

Okay, 1st of all, my personal impression; those women should examine their head for thinking such ridiculous solution and they should feel ashamed for degrading a women status, wife especially as low as a "whore". If anybody called me by those horrible word, they will definitely have my hands mark on their cheek, even if those people is my hubby. 

When I think about this club suggestion, I feel like I want to strangle the leader of this club for ever voice out this shameful idea. Yep, according to Islamic law, wife's number 1 priority is her husband (though I put my kids as my priority) but as a wife, we have a right and pride  that a husband should respect. What kind of respect does it reflected when a husband ask his wife to "perform" like a WHORE? Come on, obedience have nothing to do with the way you "treat" husband in bedroom. Moreover, there are no guarantee that a woman can keep her husband from straying away by acting as submissive as a whore and women are more likely being take for granted for doing so. 

Maybe they are just using the word as a metaphor but still the word in humiliating and inappropriate. Maybe what they really mean is as a wife, we should treat our husband "nicely & skillfully" in bedroom.  If they used the term of  "LOVER" rather then "WHORE" maybe people especially a wife like me feel less disgusted with the suggestion. Hmm, Dr.Rohaya, next time please mind your word okay!

However, we are no longer live in a caveman days where the man just pulls the women hair, take her to the caves and have his way because back then woman only regarded as sex toys and breeding media but this is 21 century where women contributes lots more than just being a toy sex and breeding media so there were no word such submission. 

What I think of this club? I am too shy and too "wise" to join this kind of club and there is NO WAY I am ever gonna join this club since I am too self-conscious to mark myself "Obedient wife" when I always have this cold shoulder war with my hubby especially when it's concerned with our leisure time; his-aquarium while mine-books & movies! Well you know, like Tom & Jerry relationship.

My god, I think I rambled out of topic already! Well, my main point is:-

1. Never ever referred wife as a WHORE even if  you don't meant it and how kind is your intention because there are vast difference between a wife and a whore. A wife is a respectful title but a whore is title of tramp!
2. Don't just saddle the burden of marriage onto one shoulder.It takes two to make a marriage work. Both the husband and wife should be good to each other. That is how thing wok well.  

P/S:- 

- Anybody who feel like a goody shoes obedient wife, please do not hesitate to join this club with shallow mind leader ( please note the sarcasms tone) ..hihihi, PEACE NO WAR (^_^) V

Date With Honeypot Wax Boutique

WARNING FOR MALE READER! WOMAN STUFF! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Yes, I am gonna have a intimate date with "Honeypot Wax Boutique". Don't start guessing! Keep reading this entry and you will understand what is it all about.. (*wink)

honeypot wax boutique

Actually, "Honeypot Wax Boutique" is the place where I am gonna have my Brazilian wax by the experts. No, not today..Not even next week but my appointment a.k.a date with them is gonna be next month ( date not yet fixed ). 

I know all of you especially gals/women know what is Brazilian wax and I am not going to explain it here, but yeah you can always google about it right? I just want to share why it's really important to me to have this appointment.

For  your information, I used to wax my legs, arms, upper-lip and underarms by myself without an experts help. I have done it for years and I dare to call myself an expert too.. Hehehe,  only when it come to wax myself since there is no way I dare to wax any living things but myself. However, this time I am gonna need an expert help since I intended to wax my private part due to hygiene purpose.

Image By Mr. Google

During my teenage year, I don't have to really worry about it since I was not really that hairy back then but after gave birth of my eldest son, I started to either trimming it with scissor or shaved it off because it started to a bit bushy down there. I was content with this two ways of "maintaining" the look of my private part until I started to have this itchiness every time I shaved it off especially a day after shaving it off and it really make me feel uncomfortable. So I tried not to shave it anymore but only trimmed it with scissor yet the same problem still occurred  and the hair down there is getting rougher.. tajam macam wayar suda rasa dia,ehhh.. So, now straight to the point, the real reason why I want to do it because  according to my friends who have done Brazilian waxing down there said, that the hair will eventually gets softer and thinner every time it grows back.

Frankly, I really wanted to try this Brazilian waxing for quite some time but I always find excuses not to do it due to my embarrassment.. Hish, malu  ba kan kalau orang tengok.. Yea, it's might be painful but I think I can  bear the pain but I don't think I can bear the embarrassment! Weird since I already have 4 kids and 3 or more people ( nurses and doctors, excluding my hubby ) already seen me down there! Geeezzzz! However, this time I will really go for it.. One of my friends said, I should get one before I turn 30 yet here I am almost turn to 29 and still never done it! Nah, tunggu la next month they can't longer tease me about it any longer..

I realized that in Islam, it's prohibited to allow other people than ourselves or our spouse to see our private part ( doctors/nurses excluding since they are doing it for medical purpose) but pardon me because I am just a woman who wanna look beautiful (including down there ya), plus my  hubby already granted me a permission and the experts also a female..

I better stop before I rant out of topic.. No matter what, the date with Honeypot Wax Boutique stand and no way I am gonna back off this time.. Any comment is welcomed ! (^_^) V

P/S : I didn't notice that I am blushing red while typing this entry, not until my boss asked, " something wrong? You face is tomato red!"

Little Notebook With Thousand Memory

My little notebook..

This morning I was rummaged through the kitchen cabinet when I found something belonged to me that missing few years ago wrapped with newspaper & hidden among the dishes & glassware. It used to be my handy notebook where I pour out my sadness, my disappointment, my tears  & my wishes but I lost it and never able to trace it until this morning. (Actually, it was an autograph book that I turned into notebook)

I stopped my activities, go the living hall and started reading whatever I've wrote down in the note book and then the tears started to pour unconsciously. Every single words written in this book reminded me of my hard time during the early years of my marriage. Every pages was written with a poem that pictured my feeling during those year and the content was really personal to me. I lost track of time while reading it and I don't even notice that I cried out loud until my hubby asked me, " What happened? Why are you crying?'

"Nothing important. It's just that this note of mine make me cry." I explain to him.

"What note? It's must really touching if it make you cry." Hubby teases me.

"This note," I showed it to him. 

"How did you find it?," he asked me with guilty look on his face.. Nah, kedapatan suda siapa yang kasi tapuk..

"I found it in our kitchen cabinet, wrapped with newspaper & hidden very well among the glassware," I said to him before adding, "it's okay. I don't mad at all but this note is really personal. I am just glad I found it again." 

Years ago, I was too shy and ashamed to share my problem especially something concerned with my marriage with other people including my family that caused me to undergo a very critical emotion breakdown. Then a friend of mine advised me not to bottle up my feeling/emotion to myself. She said if I can't talk about it, I can write it down in a book or maybe a piece of paper to ease down the pressure in my heart and mind. This kind of therapy really worked for me and this note is one of the media where I channel my worries and problem..

Unlike most people who preferred to burn this kind of books/note/diaries, I keep all of mine not because I can't let it go but more about the sentimental value to me. This little notebook really hold thousand of memory that I will cherish. Though most of it about the bitter time I've encountered but still it's precious because I learn a lots of lesson during those bitter day of mine..

What will you do if you found something that remind you about your misery? Will you burn it or maybe bury it or will you keep it as a reminder that you are a survivor? 

Blurry Day For Me!

Nope, it not hazy out here.. In fact the sky is pretty blue & clear here in Puchong today.. But still everything is blurry for me today, until after I got my sight back this afternoon. Do you have any idea what I talk about? Can you guess it?

Okay, I better cut the riddles and go straight to the point before I bore up you with this kiddo riddles. Everything is blurry fro me because my contact lenses ( left eyes ) was torn this morning! That's my last pair, Huarghhh!! My fault for not cutting my sharply nails. I am so damn mad with myself and my hubby remarks "koto, siapa suruh tidak ketip tu kuku" make me even mad. I thought me might console me, ini tidak, he make fun of me instead. In future I am gonna make sure I cut my nail short & re-stocking my contact lenses supply before it's out of stock.

I can't put on my right side contact lenses because I will have this terrible headache due to the power difference, so I am in the state of para-blinded right now. You might wonder why just don't I wear my spectacle? I try to wear it but the power is out to date because lat time I change my spectacles was 2 years ago. So, the power cannot accommodates my sight any longer. Nah, another things to remember; to buy new pair of spectacle to avoid circumstance like today!

I have to go to my office because everyone else out-stationed and I am the only one who left to handle everything during their absence..(*sigh) Luckily not much work left for today since I already done most of it yesterday, so I can delay today task until tomorrow or until I get my new sets of contact lenses from my hubby. FYI, my hubby send & fetch me to & from office everyday since our workplace is close to each other, so no worry at all about driving with my poor sight condition now.. Jimat ba kan..

For the being, I am gonna stay at office to avoid me any further problem; bumping to something, step on dog shit etc while browsing through net about blurry vision. Below is one of cartoon that make me LOL!

Cartoon sourced by Mr.Google

 

 

My New Themes / Templates Mirrored Me!

Yeah., that's the truth.. I loves this new theme of mine! Hah, it's not really mine.. Million thanks to this awesome & talented designer Diana who create this templates under the theme "Flower Girl".

I loves flower as much as I loves nature! I loves being a woman and a girl! My hubby always teased me about being a woman who trapped in a girl body but it doesn't bother me at all because I loves being both of it! 

Theme From My Hand-phone!

I might thinks like a 28 years old woman but I dressed up like a fashionista girl.. Hahahaha, it seem funny but that's the truth about me.. The neighborhood where I lives with my family especially the kakak-kakak & makcik-makcik always give me the ridiculous stares due to my selection of fashion.. Ya, I am a mother of four but I dresses up like I am a sister to four! 

Oppss, here I am starting to babbling again.. Okay, straight to the points, I am a girl, a woman, a wife, a daughter, a sister and a mother who loves pretty, cute, fashionable, nice, colorful ( especially pastel, pink, purple & white ) & rare stuff! So, I use this theme because it's cute and pretty! Even my hand-phone used the same theme..LOL!

I am not good in creating my own templates / header / layout / theme, so I depends on the handwork of the brilliant designer who willing to lend their creation for free... Well, you guys rock & I loves you all! 

Anybody who want to have a nice theme like mine, please have a look on my reference ( go to my side bar under my reference )..

I Am Like A Flower

I am like a flower
Not sure of when I will die.
Not sure of when I will grow back again
When I am crushed with pain and cry.

I am not sure if I can hold myself up
When I ache with unbearable pain
What do I do when my petals fall off?
Do I go find them out in the rain?

What do I do when I'm not given enough water, to make it through the day?
What do I do when I look up in the sky?
And the sun doesn't show a ray?

I stand as tall as a flower would,
As long as I possible can.
I will stand and show my colors,
That is what I plan.

I may drupe and my petals may fall,
But that won't stop me from growing.
My love, honesty and beauty,
I will keep showing.

I am like a flower,
Strong and supreme.
I may be trampled on,
But I will never lose faith in my dreams. 

Poem Source : poetryamerica.com 

google image

What do you all think about the poem above? Do you really think you wanna be like a flower? I likes this poem but in reality I don't want to refer myself to a flower. I preferred myself to be like a tree or a coconut..Hahahaha, funny but I really do hope that I am like a coconut tree that useful even when it withered and dead. Yet, if I wanna be a flower, I want to be a white rose with thorn (a very sharp thorn indeed)that mirrored the pure and sincere personality yet strong enough to fight any intruder and obstacle.. (Hahaha, my hubby pretended to puke when he read this sentences)

However, I am happy with my being and I am grateful that I am human that gifted with mind to think and heart to feel. Well the poem above was just a beautiful metaphoric that pictured and described the thinking of the author and Gosh it's really  nice poem that able to lift up the spirit of a woman like me.

Am I totally a failure??

As I thought my day will end up as happy as I was this morning then I am totally wrong because right after my hubby fetched my kids from their nanny house, he gave me a bad, real bad news to me that almost make me faint!

My 2nd son took the money that suppose to pay his KAFA monthly fee from his brother without telling him and lost the money at his school this afternoon! This morning I entrusted my eldest son to pay their bus fare and KAFA monthly fee because I trust him and he was the one who normally help me out with the task since my hubby and I don't have much time to go to their KAFA and pay the fee by ourselves. As always, I put the money in sealed envelope and wrote their name on it. There were three envelope, one for the bus fare and the other two was for their KAFA monthly. 

I never thought that something like this will happened since my eldest son never fail to do the responsibility I gave to him yet today he forgot to pay his brother KAFA monthly fee, and he decided to pay it tomorrow but my 2nd son took the money and lost it at the school ( dia cakap la..)

My eldest son said my 2nd son asked him not to tell about it but their nanny happened to know this and she showed my hubby the torn up envelope ( without them money ) and  told what happened to  my hubby when he fetch them at her house.

I smelled something wasn't right when I saw his grim face. He locked up the door and ordered our 2 boys to go to their room while he searched for the rattan. I asked him what's wrong but no responed and I only get the hint when he started beating my 2nd son. Oh my God, I just can believed when my hubby showed the torn up envelope.. My mind went blank for a while and I am unaware that my hubby is beating my second son.. I only snapped back to reality when I heard him yelling for my help then only I grabbed both my son and asked my hubby to stop.. I was crying and pleading to him not to lost his temper! I remind him that beating them won't solve any thing..

I asked my son what happened. He admitted that he took the money without telling his brother but he said he never intended to use it.. He said he just want to keep it but one of his friend saw it and very curious what was in it.. In the end my son said, the money went missing while he went out and the only left behind was the envelope..He said he already told his teacher about it..

After chilled down, my hubby told him that he will go to his school tomorrow and asked the teacher about it to confirm that he is telling us the truth.. I really do hope that he is telling the truth..

I couldn't even enjoy my dinner because I am so distraught with this problem.. I couldn't find any reason why my son acted like this since I always trying my best to fulfill their needs.. Now I really understand how my parent felt when facing my mischief..

I couldn't even blamed my hubby since I know him very well and thing like this always  wake up his temper  yet I still mad at him for beating my son like that and I am not agreed with his way to tackle this problem.. To tell the truth, I feel like I am the one should be blamed for.. ( Sigh )

I don't know what should I do.. This is really a big blow to my confidence as a mother.. I even asked myself whether I am such failure in everything.. I sucked big time in my life and now I even feel like am totally a failure of being a mother.. I thought I already gave everything I have for my kids  but when this happened I started to question whether did I or not??

Kids come First

I think I ignored my blog this few days..This time not because I am busy with my beloved books but I am busy to improve my kids achievement in their academic. After being shocked with my eldest son  worst result in his recent test, my hubby and I investigated ( cewah, macam polis pula kan ) the real reason behind his poor achievement and in doing so, I spent less time on posting in my blog.

It's really hard to pull out the truth from my eldest son since he is too afraid to admit his mistake because he is scared of being caned by my hubby or worst he is scared I might hold his pocket money! However in the end he did admitted that he paid no attention in his class and played with his friend while his teacher teaching.. He complaint that he cannot play at home so that's why he played at school!

Image source: Google

To tell the truth, I was so damn mad with him at first because I put my highly hope in him since he is brilliant kid but at last I realized that as a mother, me too contributed to his failure. My mistake for pushing him too hard at home and gave him no chance to play but study all the time.. My hubby said, we shouldn't put too much burden on the shoulder of 9 years old boy!

For the past week, I was busy to re-arrange my kids schedule to make sure they can study but at the same time they have to play and entertain themselves.. I hope he will excel in his exam in her mid-term exam with this "learn & play" schedule to arrange for them.. No matter what, my kids come first above all ( except God ) even my hubby =P

Another updates, remembered the day when I told you all about my sis-in-law engagement day 2 weeks ago? Yes, the one where I was upset because certain people that put me in dilemma whether to attend or not. I did attended and I am gonna tell you people what I learned on that day because this special day of my sis-in-law is the 1st traditional Malay event I ever attend.. Maybe for some of you it's ancient thing but for me it's a new thing so I still wanna share about it.

So wait for my story okay! Bonne nuit everyone!

I am upset!

I am not kind of person who get angry very easily! Patience has always been my best friend since I got mixed with my in law family 10 years ago. You can't imagined how many times I almost explode yet I took grip of my anger and unleashed it somewhere else.However, I am not a Saint,  I am just a human being and my patience does have a limit just like other ordinary human being!

It's been a while this particular persons ( let me called them A & B ) tried to make me look a villain when the truth is I am the victim of their materialistic attitude. This feud started 2 years ago and until now they still  hold grunge with me. My kids and me was banned from interfering in A life. We don't even allowed to pay him visit while B was the one who quarreled with my hubby and you know what, it's all because of money! 

I never hold  grunge to any of them because I realized that me too contributed to that feud. I amnot sure about my hubby because he is a stubborn person. My hubby, A & B were stubborn kind of person and they have an ego as high as a mountain! 

I am angry and upset because I have to stay back  from attending any occasion whenever A or B will attend it! Tomorrow is my favorite sister in law engagement day. Last night my mom in  law called and told us that B will arrived at her place tonight . She asked is it okay for us?  This really irritating  & frustrating because I have no problem with B anymore! If B want to live with the past and her grunge, it's her problem not mine! I already forgave her for putting my kids and me out from A life.

The worst thing of all is how B tried to humiliated us through her comment in Facebook. Though it's not directly to us but who else she referred as "ungrateful" than us who in debt with A!  can't imagined how can she comment to other people about kindness and goodness when she never find in her heart to be kind to her own flesh and blood.

This is what i hate the most with my husband family! They are too materialistic! No money, No talks! That is their motto. This is the reason why I feel ashamed to introduced them to my kind heart family.. My family might not materially wealthy but morally they are and I am proud of my family back in Sabah!

I have shed lots of tears because of my in law family.. I hope my hubby can reconcile with A & B and end up any worthless feud between them.. Isn't blood thicker than water?  I prays that someday they will find in their heart the willing to forgive and forget..